Note to self: when deciding to walk to Chinatown, don’t pass through the Adams Morgan neighborhood where the siren song of a wonderful, vibrant, coffeehouse/bar/lounge named “Tryst” is too tempting to avoid.
It is a beautiful, breezy Saturday morning and I going to freestyle this post.
I had a moment with Caroline, my ex, where I successfully followed my “respond, don’t react” mantra. Our youngest daughter, Lexi, is coming to DC next weekend. She’s being wined and dined (actually, just dined. She’s only 20) by a bank that’s offered her an internship for the summer.
A while ago Lexi made it clear she wanted to celebrate my birthday while in town. When discussing logistics with my ex, Caroline was hesitant about inviting herself to my birthday dinner.
I graciously said, “Of course you can join us. No worries.”
Caroline blurted out, “It’ll be my treat.”
I paused. Caroline made restaurant recommendations but I wasn’t listening. I was hurt Caroline ignored my kind gesture.
Finally, I gently interrupted her and just as gently, said, “You know, a more appropriate response when I said you’re invited might have been thank you.”
Caroline began stammering, “You’re right. I’m sorry. I don’t know why I said that. Can we just start over?”
And so we did. We began discussing restaurant choices.
W hen the call was over I relished the fact I recognized my feeling real-time, responding without reacting to my initial hurt. I also catalogued the fact that despite apologizing, Caroline never actually thanked me for the invite.
In other news, I am putting my interest in Buddhism to the test tomorrow. The book, Radical Acceptance by Tara Brach, has been extremely helpful in my work toward mindfulness. Ms. Brach is a PHD in psychology, as well as the founder of the Insight Meditation Community right here in Washington, D.C.
Tomorrow, I’m attending a day-long workshop Ms. Brach is leading. My dear friend Frannie told me about it a couple of weeks ago and I immediately signed up before I could talk myself out of it.
I honestly don’t know what to expect. I received an email about it yesterday that said: “Wear yoga-type clothing and bring a water bottle with a resealable lid. We ask that you bring a vegetarian lunch or take the lunch break to go get food nearby in Chinatown.”
So I’m nervous about the day and I’m excited to hear Ms. Brach in person, and meet others on their own journeys. Duality at its finest. Apprehension and anticipation playing nicely.
I’ll definitely write about the workshop on Monday. Right now, I need to somehow tear myself away from this rocking coffee shop and get the ingredients for the cold sesame noodles I’m making for my lunch. Normally I eschew most carbs but I do love sesame noodles so what the heck.
Stay in touch. Connect.
PS I couldn’t find an appropriate clip but this one cracked me up.